Louie’s Daybreak Diner is a little diner on Weber Road, about a mile east of I-71. Upon entering, it’s immediately apparent they didn’t take the tactic that a lot of other places use regarding diner construction. It’s spacious, very much so. The kitchen is visible, and large. The seating is highly spread out (even if there could stand to be a bit more of it, it didn’t matter on this very snowy day, the only people there were 3-4 people at the front, and two cops at the back). And quite unusually, I went here with my aunt. These are usually solitary activities for me, because nobody wants to hear me discuss the finer points of french fry creation for an hour at a time. But that’s all irrelevant. How would I consider their fries? Different. On first glance, they’re very similar to Wildflower Cafe’s fries, but a little thicker. Homecut, and moderate cut. Probably about a 4.5/10 thickness. What changes is when you bite into them. They’re *very* seasoned, just like Rally’s fries, but on homecut fries. Which is nothing if not very unique. They are seasoned unevenly, so some fries have no seasoning at all, and there was about 5 fries in the batch that was like eating the hottest, spiciest Rally’s fry ever. I don’t consider this that bad of a thing, but for those that are all about exacting consistency, this might be an issue. The bigger problem was that these fries were *greasy*. Just like with Wildflower Cafe, the same discussion about homecut fries and greasiness applies, but these are way, waaaaay worse. Not the worst I’ve had in this regard, but still an uncomfortable amount of grease. Overall, this is more annoying than damaging regarding any rating. I just wish there was a better way around this. Also, no picture. Writer’s apologies.

Price: $2.00

Cut: Moderate (Homecut)

Salt: None

Seasoning: Moderate-Heavy spicy seasoning.

Wildflower Cafe is a kinda hipster cafe/diner/morning bar situated up on Indianola Ave. just north of North Broadway, near a Burger King, and about half a mile south of Beechwold Diner, one of the other reviews I’ve done here. Going inside the place, it looks kinda like it was once a house and got renovated into what it is now, giving it a very interesting, if somewhat cramped, feel. So, how is their fries? Interesting. The fries are the homecut style, and they’re very fresh. Thin cut fries, definitely a shoestring variety, probably about a 2/10 on the thickness scale, *very* browned fries, but not nearly as crispy as you’d think given that, they’re actually closer to soggy than crispy, but still very good. These are all the good qualities, but the fries are a bit greasier than you’d hope for. This happens with homecut fries, even frying at home, the grease sticks to the skin more for fries cut directly from a potato than fries that you get out of a bag. I’m not entirely sure why, but I’d like to know. Anyway, it’d be nice if these fries were gently blotted or something, but I’ve never seen a restaurant that does that. *rant over*. Also, these fries have no salt or seasoning, but they don’t really need them, the fries are interesting enough as is.

Price: $3.00

Cut: Shoestring (homecut)

Salt: None

Seasoning: None

Sonic is  fast food place, with a unique drive-thru system. But otherwise it’s not exactly extraordinary, except for the fact that there’s not a lot of them around the central Ohio area, and to a certain degree, Ohio in general. So I went to the only one I know the exact location of, and ordered their fries. How are they? A fairly thin cut, that is bordering the distinction between regular cut and shoestring cut, edge skins and a small amount of skins on the body of some of the fries. Light salt and no seasoning create a decent, but fairly bland french fry, combined with a moderately fresh, but not ideally fresh fry (but still within the range for acceptability for fast food fries). On the higher side of crispiness, about a 6/10, but this is actually slightly below average when taking into consideration the thinness of these fries. So, pretty decent. But every time I’ve been to Sonic, the wait in the drive-thru is exceedingly long, and this alone is most of the reason why I don’t go to there more often.

Price: $2.19

Cut: Shoestring (2.5/10, on the thicker edge of shoestring fries)

Salt: Light

Seasoning: None

Fitzy’s is a very retro styled diner. More than any other diner I’ve been to, it tries to emulate a movie rendition of the 1950’s. And it’s pretty cool. I came at off-peak hours, so the place seemed a bit bigger than it had to be, but that would probably be different if I went in the morning when breakfast food places have the highest amount of customers. So, how were the fries? Pretty interesting. A moderate cut, maybe slightly thicker than the typical straight cut fry, about a 5.5/10. The fries were not particularly crispy, about a 3.5/10, and on sight the fries appeared like they’d be soggy, but interestingly, that’s not the case. Even though the fries were very light yellow in color, the insides were well-cooked. They had no salt or seasoning, and there were several “edge” fries among the batch, basically the thin, somewhat pointy fries that when a potato is cut, make up the edge of the potato. Nothing wrong with this in and of itself, but the other issue here is the small serving size. Pictured below is an order of two sides of fries (and a side of onion rings, because they were served on one plate), and frankly, that’s a too small serving size for $3.09 per side. But, on the plus, the fries were very hot and fresh, and the general taste was very good. 

Price: $3.09

Cut: Moderate (5.5/10)

Salt: None

Seasoning: None

Chick-fil-A is stereotypically southern, to a degree that even Waffle House might not be, so it is kinda cool that there’s one only a few miles drive away from my house. This place is definitely closer to a fast-food experience than a dine-in place, even though it’s not a “name” fast-food restaurant. It’s got the paper fry containers on the plastic tray thing going that McDonald’s started some 60 years ago. So, how are their fries? The obvious thing, is the fries are waffle fry style, which is unusual in general, and even more unlikely given that Chick-fil-A, as mentioned before, is leaning toward the fast-food style of restaurant. It’s not an easy style to make outstanding. Given, that it’s also a difficult style to truly screw up, but average doesn’t make memories, especially not with fries. So, the good. The individual “waffles” are large and strong, not prone to breaking into crumbs. The salt is done well on these fries, not much, but very thick, giving a good emphasis of taste for a limited amount of mess. For the not so good, the fries aren’t exactly fresh. Not exactly bad, but meh. Warm, not hot, etc. And a moderate crispiness, particularly on the edges, gives way to a sogginess in the center of many of the individual fries. A little bit of crumb residue from the oil is present, but that’s not exactly unusual. Generally okay fries, but kinda featureless, as tends to be the case for waffle fries. The cut is usually expected to be its own experience, and any unique features are limited because of this fact.

Price: $1.85 (a redeeming feature, very cheap for the style and a pretty decent amount given).

Cut: Waffle (obviously).

Salt: Light, but thick “grains”. Another good feature.

Seasoning: None.

Johnny Rockets has the style of a 1950’s diner, with a definite tendency toward chain restaurant sensibilities. In a way, it’s very comparable with Steak & Shake, in that they intentionally try to cultivate the dine in fast food niche. Does it work? And how are their fries? For the first, yes. I can definitely imagine this being an updated version of how that era’s diners would look. For the second? Not so much. Despite the industrial fryer being close enough that I could stare right at it from my seat, the fries were surprisingly not fresh. They were closer to lukewarm than piping hot, and that’s simply unforgivable for a place that doesn’t have a drive-thru and encourages family dining. The fries had moderate skins on them, not exclusively focused on the edges, but evenly distributed. A moderate cut, about a 4.5/10, and similarly moderate crispiness. No seasoning and only a very light salting. But the story here is that the fries seemed to be not fresh at all, even though there’s no way they could have been anything else.

Price: $2.99

Cut: Moderate (4.5/10).

Seasoning: None.

Salt: Very light.